A Royal Flush

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When you live in the country you’re just one flush away from disaster.

So here’s the deal.  Our septic tank was old, worn out, and not performing like it used to.  So we called a septic service to get the tank pumped.  Again.  And we ordered a shiny new septic tank.  (Every girl’s dream).

The actual tank thingy was a box made of concrete block about 40 years ago.  It’s buried near the house.  The whole system looks like this.

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Here’s the truck that brought the guys that did the pumping.

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This process involved the men standing around, looking down into the tank, and shaking their heads (in a negative way).

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Much pumpage commenced.

Now here’s the crappy part.  Len told me that between the pumping of the old septic tank and the hooking up of the new tank, we couldn’t flush the toilets for 24 hours IF everything went according to plan.  According to plan?  When has that ever happened?

Much fretting commenced.

The next day a rather cute backhoe arrived with a talented operator inside.  (See first picture; kinda’ cute isn’t it?)

Much digging commenced.

The old tank was dug up and destroyed.  The hole that was left was made so deep and so wide that I almost saw China.  I also saw a buried electric line and an irrigation line break in the course of all that excavating.  That was NOT “according to plan”.

Much swearing commenced.

Next, came the biggest truck I’ve ever touched with my own hands.  It weighed 18 tons and sported a big crane which was needed to hoist our shiny new septic tank into position.

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I thought the new tank would be the size of a dog house but instead, it was the size of a barn!  Check it out; 12 tons of glorious concrete.

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Up it went with the crane, then down into the giant hole.  The next step was to hook everything up with a bunch of new pipes.  When the backhoe finally buried the new tank and finished the job I ran inside to test the flushability of the whole project.  Ahhhh!

Much relief commenced.

The trouble with owning a home is that no matter where you sit, you’re looking at something you should be doing.  —Anonymous

Comments

  1. Kathy Bolyanatz says:

    Oh Val…YOU ARE HYSTERICALLY FUNNY!!!

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