Testosterone And Jello For Brains

kids watching TV

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again.  My mom was right when she told us that sitting too close to the TV would turn our brains to Jello.  There’s living proof in my house.

I came home from church the other day (my husband doesn’t go with me; claims he’s allergic or some such thing) to hear this being shouted from the other room:

“Flag!  Flag!  Where’s the flag?!  Oh, I can’t believe it!  Are you blind?”

When I tripped into the room it was, “Val, check this out!  Can you believe there’s no flag on this play?”

This time of year it’s a wonder our brains don’t melt down completely.  There’s just too much TV watching.  And the thing that causes the most gray matter Jellofication is football.  Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy watching a good game now and then when both teams manage to score and those scores are high and the colors of the uniforms are nice and maybe a frozen pizza is involved.

I’ve reminded my husband that the players, coaches, and refs really can’t hear him when he yells but it’s no use.

Some nights around 5:30 our living room sounds like this:

Len: “You’re all just a big bunch of do-nothing blow-hards who don’t even work for a living!”

Me: “You know, members of Congress can’t really hear you.  Washington DC is too far away.”

What makes us think that TV is a 2-way interactive media?

I thought this was just a man thing but the other night while watching Jeopardy (yes, I watch Jeopardy) I caught myself yelling, “Particle accelerator!  PARTICLE ACCELERATOR!  COME ON!”  while the 3 contestants remained mute and glassy-eyed.

We all do this, right?   Or am I just trying to feel sane (again)?

Do you realize if it weren’t for Edison we’d be watching TV by candlelight?  —Al Boliska

But wait, there’s more!  For more on testosterone oddities click “Testosterone And Food On Fire”


  1. Val, I love your blog. You really are a good writer. You make me laugh and think. Sometimes at the same time. Keep it up!

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